GROWING OLDER AND WISER

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio .

"To celebrate growing older,

I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once

more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short - enjoy it.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and

family will. 

5. Don't buy stuff you don't need.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for things that matter.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their

journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15 Everything can change in the blink of an eye But don't worry; God never blinks.

16..Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to be happy. But it's all up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't

save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness

but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28.Forgive but don't forget. 

29. What other people think of you is none of your business. 

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34.God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37.Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile

and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. Accept what you already have not what you

need.

42.The best is yet to come...

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

SPRING MORNING

A Morning Offering

I bless the night that nourished my heart
To set the ghosts of longing free
Into the flow and figure of dream
That went to harvest from the dark
Bread for the hunger no one sees.

All that is eternal in me
Welcome the wonder of this day,
The field of brightness it creates
Offering time for each thing
To arise and illuminate.

I place on the altar of dawn:
The quiet loyalty of breath,
The tent of thought where I shelter,
Wave of desire I am shore to
And all beauty drawn to the eye.

May my mind come alive today
To the invisible geography
That invites me to new frontiers,
To break the dead shell of yesterdays,
To risk being disturbed and changed.

May I have the courage today
To live the life that I would love,
To postpone my dream no longer
But do at last what I came here for
And waste my heart on fear no more.

~ John O’Donohue ~

A DECADENT DOSE OF FANTASY ON VALENTINE'S DAY

I have been spending many of these gloomy winter days reading the Grimm Fairy Tales-stories collected by Wilhelm and Jacob Grimm in the late 1800's that served up life as a generation of central Europeans knew it-capricious and often cruel. The two brothers were determined to preserve German folktales and became accidental entertainers. I am loving the dark side of many of these beloved fairy tales.

I've also begun re-watching many of my old favorite fairy tale movies: Alice in Wonderland, Sleepy Hollow, Lady In the Water, Edward Sissorhands, Never Ending Story, Labyrinth, and Legend to name a few.  I have become so enamored that many of my new Spirit Art Dolls are morphing into Dark Faerie Dolls!

If you are in the mood tonight for a truly enchanting Faery movie I highly recommend 'Legend'- Ridley Scott's delightful fairy tale. This cult classic features a young Tom Cruise as Jack, a forest boy fighting to save the land and the woman he loves from Tim Curry’s evil Lord of Darkness. Hailed for its visual beauty, the movie was a fantastical adventure through a faery world both light and innocent down to the dark and terrifying depths of nightmare. With goblins and elves, a brave hero fighting a dark Lord, a beautiful princess and–of course–unicorns, this truly is the stuff legends.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

ON TURNING SIXTY

Today is my birthday. I am turning 60 years old.  I have been dreading this birthday...but, my best friends tell me I don't look or act 60. And, anyway, there is a certain status that comes with being 60, they say.

Lots of things have happened in my life-very happy things, very sad things, very important things.  When I reflect on my life I am thankful for all that I have experienced, and in truth I wouldn't change much. The good thing about getting older is that you gain perspective on all those experiences-both good and bad. How and why I got from point A to point B has become much clearer.

I have also had much good fortune in my life.  I married my high school sweetheart and have four amazing children. I have many wonderful friends. And, I have been blessed to work at something I love.

Fear might be my only regret.  In my 60 years on this planet I have learned that there is great value in being fearless. When I was younger I think I protected myself from situations and people because I was afraid to put myself out there. Now I have a sense of fearlessness and freedom I didn't have when I was younger.

I have had some magical birthday celebrations already, beginning in early December with a huge party in Chicago with all my Gannon siblings, continuing with dinners and lunches out with my family and friends, and culminating today with a special surprise from Kristin who took the day off from work to spend ALL DAY with her 'very old' Mom. With any luck this special treatment will continue throughout the month (:

CONGRATULATIONS MOLLY AND LUKAS!

Our youngest daughter, Molly, and her boyfriend, Lukas, are engaged! They are estatically happy....and it is infectious. We are all thrilled about their engagement and upcoming wedding.

So, we are in 'wedding planning' mode here. Our conversations now are all about wedding ceremonies, venue locations, guest lists, 'Save The Date' cards, engagement photographs, etc. etc. etc.

How different wedding planning is now then it was thirty-seven years ago when Tom and I got married. We choose a date in October (3 months after we got engaged) that didn't compete with an opening hunting season (seriously), went and talked to the priest we wanted to marry us to make sure he was available that day, booked the church, and began our preparations.  We asked a friend who owned a restaurant if he would do a pig roast in the park near our home for our reception. I made our wedding invitations and sent them; bought an ivory colored dress from my favorite department store. We wrote our vows. When our wedding day came, we were ready.  It was a very simple affair: a big picnic shared with family and friends under a canopy of crimson and gold colored trees. A magical day.

Molly's wedding will be much different then mine. She (and I) will work on her wedding for almost a year. There will be details upon details upon details to work out.

And, I know that Molly and Lukas' wedding day will also be incredibly magical. It couldn't help but be anything else......but, it makes me laugh to think how different our journeys will have been to get to the same place. (:

THE DARK MAGIC OF ALL HALLOWS EVE

Come with me All Hallow's night

We'll frighten everyone in sight

Such pranks for once, are justified

And fun and frolic amplified.

 Samhain, All Hallos Eve, Halloween, Dia de los Muertos (which falls on October 31st) is deep Autumn. Crispy-cold evenings with leaves blowing underfoot and the smell of woodsmoke. Long dark nights with clouds scattering overhead. Chilly mornings that lift damp fingers to a veiled sun.

Samhain is a time of change-for letting go of the old and making way for the new. For many who practice earth-based traditions, it is the turning point of the year, the dark half of the wheel, a time to reach through the veil and communicate with the otherworld.

It is a time for going within to the darkness, into our shadows, and meeting ourselves and those who have gone before....remembering that death is just a phase of our journey.

To celebrate this magical season, we carve jack-o-lanterns and make pumpkin bread from our garden pumpkins. We decorate our home with dried leaves, apples,  pumpkins, Indian Corn, masks, and witches (lots of witches)! We burn spicy-scented candles and take time for reflection in their flickering light.

MABON APPROACHES

As a child I understood the season changes through the portends of nature....the black and orange fuzz of a wooly bear caterpillar foretold the nearness of Halloween, and legend had it that the thickness of her coat foretold how cold the upcoming winter would be. Apple picking meant the end of summer and the beginning of crisp, sweet Autumn. To this day, Fall remains my favorite season. And, I now also know this season-shifting time as 'Mabon', or The Autumn Equinox.

'Mea'n Fo mhair' (which is what the Druids called Mabon), honors the Green Man, God of the Forest. Offerings of libations to the trees in the way of cidars, wines, herbs and fertilizers are appropriate at this time. 

At Mabon the light and dark once again sit facing each other with equal sway. The coolness of the darkness has come to soothe our sun-drenched brows, but we have not yet descended into the dark half of the year. Here in Wisconsin, we are nearing our first frost, but, the days are still balmy and pleasant; yet on the wind I can smell Autumn.

There is something quite alive about Autumn, even though it marks the first 'deaths' as the tilt of the earth takes the northern hemisphere away from the sun. The summer dogs days have passed and it is time to snuggle in, in preparation for winter's coming chill.